The Freelancer – Chapter 94

I had no idea what Oleander was besides the name of a chick flick I didn’t see, but the ER staff knew what they were dealing with. They promised to do what they could and took me into the waiting area.  I called on the way in to have her family released from protective custody.  They had a right to be here with her now.

More right than I did.

They arrived with Trista and Blaine a few minutes after I did.  I told them everything I knew about her condition, but kept the details of the situation vague.  Trista’s eyes shot daggers at me as I spoke.

She slapped me.  “You sonofabitch!  This is your fault.  Collin told me you would protect her!”

“What are you talking about, honey?” Blaine asked in an attempt to calm her.

Trista turned to them.  “Jackson is with the FBI.  He’s been lying to all of us since he got here. So has his pal, Collin. Is he off doing your paperwork while you sit up here and pretend to give a shit about Jenna?”

“He’s dead. Blackstone took him out before he got to Jenna.”

Trista didn’t blink. “He killed Maureen, too…didn’t he?”

I nodded and Trista turned away, shaking her head.

Elaine looked at me in horror.  “Is this true, Jackson?”

I closed my eyes.  “I’m afraid it is.”

She opened her mouth and no words came out. Her face was expressive as her mind caught up with what Trista already knew about me. I braced myself, waiting for the onslaught of anger she would unleash once she found the words.

“But…Jenna loves you.”

“I know. I love her.”

“Oh, just shut up.” Trista advanced on me. “This is your fault. All of it.”

“Trista…”

“Maybe if you’d spent a little more time working on your case instead of screwing around with Jenna while you investigated her then this wouldn’t have happened.”

“I know.”

Everyone was quiet after that.  I don’t know how much time passed and I didn’t care; time was meaningless to me.  I rubbed my temples, willing time to stop and move in reverse, but of course, that was impossible.

If only I had been straight with Jenna in the beginning.  If only I thought to place a team at the fuel hanger.  If only I stopped the first time I passed them.  If only…

I looked up at the clock, but the numbers didn’t make sense to me.  The hands of the clock floated over spinning numbers.  I blinked several times to clear my vision and realized tears welled in my eyes.

When Melissa left me, I thought I knew sorrow, but now I realized I had been a damned fool then and I was a damned fool now.  If Jenna died…God only knows what Blackstone told her about me.  I held my head in my hands and prayed for one more chance to let Jenna know how I really felt about her.

She couldn’t die.

“Mrs. Whitman?” a doctor asked as he approached our group.

“Yes, that’s me.”  Her voice was frantic.

“We were able to control the toxin.  Your sister is going to be just fine.  She’s awake now and is asking for you.”

“Can I see her?” I asked quickly, rising to my feet.

The doctor raised his hands to stop me.  “Right now, she only wants to see her sister.  She’s still very weak and she can’t take a lot of excitement.”

Elaine left with the doctor and no one said anything for a long time.  I noticed the angry glances Trista and Daniel kept sending my way, but I knew they were justified in their anger.  Even Daniel. The man was a lot of things, but I came into his house, played with his daughter, ate dinner at his table and lied my ass off about everything. Mercifully, Blaine broke the silence.

“Well, you certainly had me fooled, Jackson.  I never would have pegged you for FBI.”

I didn’t respond.  Elaine returned a few minutes later.  Her eyes were cold. Whatever Blackstone told Jenna about me, her sister didn’t like it.

“Jenna would like to know if your wife really died, Jackson.” Her voice held no emotion.

“No,” I answered quietly.  “My ex-wife lives in Baltimore with my ex-partner.”

Elaine crossed her arms over her chest.  “Then Jenna would like for you to leave now.”

Shit. I knew that slip was going to bite me in the ass one of these days. I woke up almost every  morning since I said it wondering when it would catch up with me. Of all the ways I imagined, of all the ways things could end between me and Jenna…Not like this.

“I need to talk to her.”

“You can have a different agent question her or debrief her or whatever you call it. But she will not talk to you. She doesn’t want to see you and I’m not letting you get anywhere near her. If I was smart, I would have told her to run for the hills to get away from you instead of encouraging it.”

“Elaine, this isn’t about the case. It’s about us.”

“There is no us between you and my sister. You used her.”

“It’s really not like that.” I wouldn’t be able to make her understand. I didn’t have the words to explain how I felt about Jenna. “If I go…Will you at least give her a message for me? Will you let her know that not all of it was part of my job? Will you tell her it was real?”

“No. I’ve let you hurt my sister enough for a lifetime.

“It’s not like…No. I’m not leaving here until Jenna knows that I’m in love with her, really in love with her.”

“You need to leave,” Trista shouted, drawing the attention of an orderly near the nurses’ station.

“I’m not going anywhere. I’ll tell her myself and then I’ll leave when she tells me to, but she needs to know how I feel about her.”

A security officer came into view. “Everything okay here?”

Trista shot me a look. “No. This man is harassing us.”

“Sir, I think it’s time to go.”

“No.” I shoved past him in the direction of the patient rooms. “Jenna! Jenna! I love you!”

“Rudy, call the cops and page the other security officers.”

Blaine stepped in. “That won’t be necessary. He’s leaving.” He placed a hand on my shoulder. “You’re not making things better.”

I let him guide me out of the waiting room. “It’s not like I can make things worse.”

“You may deal with bad guys, but you don’t know the meaning of making things worse until you antagonize Trista and Elaine.” He waited for the sliding glass doors to close behind us and added, “I’ll tell her, Jackson.”

“Oh, God, thank you.”

“You shouldn’t count on it doing any good. Don’t get your hopes up.” He gave me a serious look. “You don’t have any allies in this.”

“I know. I just…I need to know I tried. I need to know I didn’t lose her without a fight.”

He nodded. “I would feel the same if it were Trista.” Blaine moved through the automatic doors and turned back to me. “I’m sorry about your partner. He seemed like an okay guy. Maureen really liked him. She told me the last time I saw her.”

The doors closed between us, severing my last line of communication to Jenna.

Continue reading…

…Go back

© 2010, Sydney Katt. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use of content will result in dragon attacks.