The Freelancer – Chapter 51

There was confusion in Jenna’s eyes as she looked at me.  Things were happening too fast, but I knew she didn’t understand.  Hell, I doubted I would be able to explain it to her no matter how hard I tried.

“What’s wrong, Jackson?”

A lot was wrong, actually.  I was an FBI agent who’d been sent to watch her, not fall in love with her.  It might be possible for me to pretend I didn’t love her if we stopped now, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to deny it to myself if we made love.  She would never understand; probably never forgive me if I didn’t stop this now.  I couldn’t give her what she wanted.  I couldn’t give her forever.  We had maybe a month at most before my case would be closed, one way or the other, and I would have to move back out of her life.

I wouldn’t hurt the woman I loved in that way.  I couldn’t.  Truly, it would be better if I walked away now and continued to tell myself I didn’t like spending time with her.

“I didn’t come here prepared for this tonight, Jenna.  I shouldn’t have started it.”  I averted my eyes.  “I should go.”

“Like hell,” she snapped.

Her words caught me off guard.  I think this was the first time I’d heard Jenna swear.  My eyes met hers again in surprise.

“I’m not going to let you keep doing this to me, Jackson.  You can’t come over here night after night to turn me on and leave me unsatisfied.”

“That’s not what I’m trying to do.”

She rolled her eyes.  “Hmm.  You sure could have fooled me.  You’ve got a twisted idea of how to do the right thing.”

I opened my mouth, but there were no words.

“Look, Jackson.  I want you.  You want me.  I’m ready.  You’re ready.  We’re in bed.  What else do you want?  A gilded invitation to sex?”

I swallowed hard.  “Protection, Jenna.  I hadn’t planned on making love tonight.  I didn’t come prepared.”

Her lips curved into a smile.  “Oh.”  She laughed.

“I’m sorry, but I fail to see the humor in this situation.”

She pulled me down onto her and kissed me lightly.  “Nightstand.”

“Huh?

“Condoms, Jackson.  They’re in the nightstand.”

“You planned this?”  I was amazed.  Then again, I’d been planning on the same thing before seeing the video at her sister’s house.

She arched her body to reach into the nightstand drawer.  It was perhaps the sexiest thing I’d seen.  Tossing the box at me she said, “After almost not being interrupted by Trista, I thought it would be a good idea to hit the store early this morning before you picked me up.”

As a fresh wave of lust washed over me, I started to pull off her underwear, but stopped short.  If this affair was sure to end with her hating me then the least I could do was make sure I left her with the memory of at least a single amazing night.  I nipped at her skin just above the fabric, grinning at her response.

Her breath drew in sharply.  “What the hell are you waiting for?”

“For you to want me more than you’ve ever wanted anyone else.”

“Men and their egos,” she muttered.

“It’s not ego when the skills back it up, babe.”

Before she could respond, I trailed my mouth down her thigh, using teeth again at the sensitive flesh at the inside of her knee.  Her gasped response spurred me back up her thigh, pausing just left of the promised land until her anticipation became palatable tension in the air.  Then I repeated the exact same thing on the other leg, again stopping just ot the right of where I knew she wanted me.  When I did get around to removing that slip of fabric, it took all my willpower to work my way back up her body to devour her mouth with mine while sliding a hand up the inside of her thigh.  She tore away from the kiss and cried out when I slid a finger inside of her.

“Jackson…now.”

“Not yet.”  I did something clever with my hand and she screamed.

“Now…”

I stilled my hand, wanting her to be sure about this.  “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Her breathing was ragged.  “Yes.”  She arched against me and I felt her hands against my boxers, stroking me.  I fought to remain in control.

“Do you want me?” I asked as I quickly discarded the last of my clothes to the floor.

“Yes.”

I tore open one of the packets and unrolled it over myself.  “You’re sure?”

“Dammit, Jackson!  Just do it already!”

Well, she was going to hate me when it was all said and done, but I couldn’t make myself care in that moment.  It took every bit of my control to go slow, inching my way into her slick heat without hurting her.  Fuck, I wanted to ravage and destroy her after the past few days of stopping and starting.  Once I settled in as far as I could, I realized she wasn’t breathing.  “Are you alright?”

Jenna didn’t answer.  Instead, she wrapped her legs around my waist and kissed me with a force I didn’t think I’d ever expected from her.  Her arms found their way around my neck as I began to move against her.  I took it as slow and easy as I could stand, enjoying her kiss, the feel of her body, the building storm that I could barely control raging within me.

When her breathing quickened, I realized she was close from some part of my brain still capable of thought.  She buried her face against my shoulder as I thrust harder, driving her over the edge.  Her climax was intense, pulling me over the edge with her.  It was the damnedest thing, though.  Even though I had just had the most mind-splintering orgasm of my life, I was still hard as a rock.

I withdrew, discarded the condom in the wastebasket by the nightstand and sheathed myself again before Jenna even realized what was happening.  I drove myself back into her with one hard thrust as that one final thread of my self-control shattered violently.  I took her mouth with mine one last time before I began to move hard and fast, thinking of nothing; only feeling.

The feel of her body was amazing.  I might have whispered something into Jenna’s ear, but I’d be damned if I had any idea what I’d said.  My mind was telling me to slow down, to not be this rough with her, but my body ignored the message.  Her nails bit into my shoulders as we rocked, her breath became more ragged and her cries more insistent.  When I couldn’t hold back a second longer I emptied myself into her and collapsed against her as she shuddered from the intensity of her own climax.

We stayed like that for a long time before I was able to find the strength to move myself off her.  I stared at the ceiling and fought to catch my breath.  Without a word, Jenna got out of bed and left the room.  The soft click of the bathroom door being closed had the effect of a door being slammed in my brain.  It didn’t take a genius to know it was never a good sign when a woman jumped out of bed and hid in the bathroom after sex.

“Fuck.”

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